I Promise to Smile
by Ornavy
Summary: Sometime you find a reason to smile at the toughest points in your life.


**This is very old work I never intended to post, so if it's dissimilar to my current work that's the reason. I just revised it and edited some stuff, writing style's a bit trashy tbh but I really like this oneshot. Also, as you can already probably tell, this is a very small one-shot I finished in like 20 minutes.**

* * *

 **I Promise to Smile**

I rushed up the stairs, the elevator was taking too long. What the hell?

We walked home and he was perfectly fine.

He texted me- this was all my fault! Only if I hadn't gone and told him to drive his own ass over to my house if he needed help, only if I had, just for once... Just once hadn't been so stuck up and gone to his house only if-

"Please refrain from running in these hallways. It's extremely dangerous."

Fuck that!

I had frantically searched through the hallway looking for ICU where Naruto was getting operated on.

Finally finding it I stared through the circular glass window that exposed everything happening in those four walls.

Please.

I closed my eyes, not being able to handle what I was seeing. Why was this affecting me so much? I knew he would be fine. He always was. He said he wouldn't go anywhere without me and that I couldn't escape him either.

Even death was something he would play with if it meant that he could keep his promises.

Why my heart threatened to slip past my throat and and onto the floor... I didn't know.

I could faintly hear the conversations going on inside.

"-blood loss-"

"Nurse-"

"Losing-"

They sounded panicked.

No, no they didn't. I repeated to myself, trying to calm myself.

A nurse banged the door open on me and I stumbled back, grabbing onto my forehead loosely. He didn't turn to look back and apologies as he ran down the white hallway.

Shit.

How was it inside?

I slowly walked towards a few seats attached to the wall in front of the ICU. Keeping my head down and my eyes crushed together. Breathing shallow. Scared that if I did something wrong it would get whoever was sitting up there mad and my punishment would be my precious person.

No.

Feeling a warm hand on my shoulder and hearing my name called out gently, I dared to look up at who it was breaking whatever mantra I was chanting to keep my sanity.

"Sasuke..." Minato tightened the grip on my shoulder, the action telling me that it would be okay.

This wasn't how it was supposed to be. If I were in there and Naruto was here along with my parents he would do whatever to convince them that I would be fine because Naruto would have no doubt that I would come back just fine.

So why... Why was I being weak?

And selfish, the parent comforting me was the same one I had abandoned as I had rushed from the front desk as soon as they told me Naruto's location.

I let out a strained smile, thinking of how Naruto would deal with the situation. "It's- it's going to be okay. You know he's a fighter." Who was I trying to convince?

Another nurse slipped out from the ICU and looked at us with a soft, concerned face. "We need a blood donor. He's lost a lot of blood."

"I-

I screamed out but bit my tongue. How desperate was I?

We didn't even have the same blood type. Minato looked at me with saddened eyes. Kushina was still looking away sniffling quietly.

Naruto had a very, extremely rare blood type. Same as his mother's but she wasn't allowed to donate blood, she was in critical state herself. I glared at whatever was growing inside her stomach. It wasn't more important than Naruto.

Looking at our faces the nurse bite her lip. "I see..." She walked past us, her strut turning into a slow jog to a quiet run.

They were going to find blood for him. They could.

Of all the times Garra had to be out of the continent, did it have to he now? He was the only other person I knew that had the same blood type as Naruto.

* * *

My eyes were threatening to shut themselves. I was emotionally drained.

The little buzz of the ICU light turning off got made me snap out of it and concentrate on what was most important at the moment.

Naruto...

The doctor walked out and my head snapped towards his face looking for any sort of clues on what the news was. Not that I don't know already. He was perfectly fine.

He shook his head. "I'm sorry but Naruto didn't... He's not with us anymore."

"Thanks doctor, I knew he would- sorry. I think I misheard?" He was perfectly fine I knew that.

"I'm sorry, son, but he's no more." I launched myself at the doctor and held onto his collar, pushing him back and slamming him againt a wall.

"What the fuck do you mean? It's your fucking job to save him. You made an oath. Didn't you? He was a fighter. Who paid you? Tell me! I'll skin the fucker alive. Who wants him dead-

I got snatched off of the doctor and pushed back to sit down on a seat as hot angry tears threatened to slip out and ridicule me further. "Uchiha…" Kushina's voice was weak but still threatening. "He tried his best." Kushina's tears started falling again. "Naruto tried his best."

I shook my head, aggressively while speaking. "Trying didn't save him. Trying isn't going to bring him back."

* * *

Kushina had fainted from all the stress and was taken into another room in the hospital.

Fuck today was a shitty day.

Minato had gone after Kushina and was sitting next to her while she was resting in her own hospital bed, still unconscious. At least she was fine.

Walking into the room I looked at Naruto's lifeless body. The paperwork was being handled and he couldn't go home... put to rest two days from now. The funeral was going to be a huge wave of crushing hurt to anyone who had met Naruto. He was special after all.

I walked over to it and pressed one of my hands onto one of his cheek. His skin colder than mine. He normally burned hotter than the sun.

Why was he cold.

His body was pale, compared to how he normally looked.

His face... Naruto...

"That's not fair, idiot. Stop playing dead. You aren't some animal. Get up. Look at you, you're lying to yourself right now. You said that you'd die with me! Get up! Get up! Get up! Get. Up!" I reached down to hold onto his shoulders and shook him. "Get up! Don't leave me like this..." Hot tears streamed down my face as realization hit me.

Stop.

Make it stop.

He wasn't going to wake up.

It wasn't supposed to be this way.

"Naruto..." I picked up one of his hands and brought it up to my cheek with both of my hands. His warmth wasn't there. The feeling I felt at the pit of my stomach wasn't how I normally felt when he did this to me. When he touched me, when he had his eyes close… sleeping next to me as I woke up with him beside me every now and then.

This time it wasn't embarrassment and love.

This time it was hate, loss, grief and so much sorrow.

His limp hand slipped out of my grip and fell back into the bed proving that it was as lifeless as the rest of him.

"Idiot..."

* * *

Naruto's funeral was pure dread.

I never had I been is such a depressing setting. We laid out white flowers over his coffin as we said a few things about how much we loved him.

And soon one by one everyone started to leave.

I stared at his grave after no one was standing at the cemetery anymore.

"How could you leave like that?" After gathering my thoughts and some privacy, I could give Naruto a piece of my mind. That asshole.

"It's not fair. You can't make me fall in love with you and then leave after saying that we'd die together. Hey, I'm talking to you... What made you listen to me and shut up? Out of all the times you could stop talking why do you have to choose now to do it? And in this manner. Hey, I like the way you talk. Please..."

I looked away and stood in complete silence as I tried not to cry. He wouldn't want to see more tears.

You can't leave me.

* * *

It has been five years since Naruto's death and I'm currently standing beside Naruto's grave with two sunflowers in my hand. One from me and one from our daughter. I had left her behind, saying that her dads needed sometime alone for once.

Naruto, he loved sunflowers.

"Hey, it's me." I smiled. I had finally convinced myself that Naruto wouldn't appreciate my fake smiles anymore. I got myself together and didn't visit him until I was able to do just that. To smile.

Still smiling I wished Naruto a happy birthday and talked about business and our daughter. I had adopted her under Naruto and my name two years ago. I knew Naruto always wanted a daughter. Something I couldn't give to him. Something he couldn't give himself.

It makes me look obsessed but I could never love anyone as much as I loved Naruto.

Kushina and Minato said I should move on. I can't.

His friends told me to move on. I can't.

My family tells me to look for my happiness. I don't need to find it, it's right here, in front of me.

I promise to smile, so she can smile just as bright as you did. I promise to laugh, so she can laugh as loud as you did. I promise to love, so she can love as much as you did. I promise to be happy, so she can be as happy as you were.

But most of all I promise to love you more than I did yesterday and less than I will tomorrow.

"Wait for me, okay?" I let out a shaky whisper, a silent, persistent, tear slipped down my cheek as I smiled.

I knew it was okay to cry, because they were happy tears.

Because I knew he would wait for me.

* * *

 **Also, omfg I don't even know when Colours will be update orz**

 **BUT I do have many current/newly written one-shots to upload.**

 **Though, I'm surprised I even got to get this through and on here. School is eating me the fuck up. I'm seriously dead rn.**

 **Reviews are highly appreciated, ty, ty. 3**


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